Public speaking has been ranked the number one fear, ahead of death. And since death is the inevitable, it makes sense to conquer your fear of public speaking and even become a successful public speaker! This public speaking blog aims to give you insightful and easy-to-apply tips on various aspects of public speaking that includes overcoming your fear of public speaking, writing speeches, delivering speeches, excelling in presentations, adding humor and much more!

Friday, June 09, 2006

"Public Speaking for All" has moved!

I have moved the blog to Wordpress - cleaner layout with a more effective way of managing my content. More good stuff coming up so keep coming back!

http://blog.ericfeng.com

Would be great if you can change your link to http://blog.ericfeng.com too. Thanks!!!

See you all at wordpress!

Tuesday, June 06, 2006

Things happen, pay attention!

Telling personal stories or anecdotes is one of the easiest and most effective way of connecting with your audience. It is fool-proof. You can be the most boring speaker in the entire universe but when you tell a personal story, you will automatically be forgiven. Not only do your stories build rapport with your audience, they differentiate you from the rest of the speakers. In the eyes of your audience, you are unique!

However many speakers fail to take advantage of their wealth of stories that they have accumulated over the years. It is like a gold mine waiting to be tapped! And I urge you to START MINING FOR STORIES!!!

"But I don't have great stories to tell!"

Not true. If you open your eyes and pay attention, you will find tons of stories to tell. As Jim Key, 2003 World Champion Speaker emphasized - "Things happen, pay attention!" They may not necessarily be of Hollywood quality but that doesn't mean they aren't good enough. In fact with all the hype over Hollywood flicks, we are dying to hear some everyday stories that can happen to any one of us. Think back to your last dinner with your friends. Didn't everyone has some stories to bring to the table?

Just this morning, something funny happened at my house. And I paid attention!

Room-mate 1: (complaining) My life sucks!
Room-mate 2: (earnestly) Don't worry. It would be over soon.
Room-mate 1: My life??!!

There you go. A piping hot story that I can share with my friends and audience. And I can use it to prove a point. Instead of telling the "Is the cup half full or half empty" story (which is extremely cliche!), I could replace it with the above anecdote. 100% original. Who would have thought of it? Things happen, pay attention!

So here's what I would encourage all of you to do. Things happen all the time. If you open your eyes and pay attention, you will be overwhelmed with stories to tell. Always keep a pencil and paper in your pocket. Every time something interesting happens, write it down. It could be a conversation with your mum. It could be an incident that happened at a restaurant. If you find it interesting or funny, write it down. Transfer it to your computer and save all these stories into one folder. You may even want to categorize your stories in whichever way you want. This folder is going to be your treasure chest. The next time you speak, open up your treasure chest and pick a couple of stories that you think would relate to your message. Incoporate them into your speeches and see how you effortlessly wow your audience away! Trust me, it works ALL the time!

p.s: Interested to win a free ebook that teaches you to become an effective and charismatic speaker? All you got to do is share with us something interesting that happened to you this week. This would be an opportunity for you to apply what I have just shared with you - things happen, pay attention! You can post it via comments and remember to leave me your email address too. I look forward to reading your stories!

Saturday, June 03, 2006

Just for Laughs: The Mechanics of Humor



Humor is all about creating surprises! The bigger the surprise, the more laughter you create. This video is an excellent example. :)

Friday, June 02, 2006

Get in the Game, but not without a Coach!

Came across this article written by a 1999 World Champion speaker, Craig Valentine. Remember the third speaking secret I shared with you on the importance of being coachable? This article offers deeper insights into how you can find the right coach and maxmize your coaching experience with him or her.

Get a what?

Champions get coached. In 1999 I won the World Championship of Public Speaking for Toastmasters International and have been speaking regularly ever since. Several years later, after a disastrous speech in Montreal, I went back to my hotel room, threw my head on my pillow, and faced the following reality: I need a coach badly!

Although I had never had a public speaking coach to aid in my considerable success to that point, I knew I needed one to take my speaking to the next level. Therefore, I decided to call a person who is supposed to be one of the best public speaking coaches in the country. I said, "I would like to be coached by you." She asked, "Are you sure?" I said, "Yes. I did my research and I know you are the one I want to coach me?" She said, "Do you know how much I charge?" I said, "At this point, it would cost me more not to get coached." She said, "Great!" Then she quoted her daily fee and I thought to myself, "Well, I am pretty happy with the skills that I have."

Then I thought, "Wait a minute. Tiger Woods is the best golfer in the world and he has a coach. All sports teams have coaches, and every extremely successful speaker I have ever heard of has had a coach. Wake up Craig. You need a coach!" Despite my reluctance, I decided to go for it and it was one of the best decisions I ever made in my life. In fact, I signed up for two days! When you decide to get coached, you will find it to be one of your greatest decisions too as long as you follow these critical pieces of advice:

Seek Education not Validation

When I flew across country to work with my speech coach, she immediately questioned some of my longstanding strategies and practices I used as a speaker. She even physically slapped me on the hand at times to correct me on certain habits. While completely in shock, I remember looking at my ego and saying, "You might want to leave the room for the next two days, because I will not need you." Fortunately I was able to remove my ego in time for this valuable education.

It always amazes me how every now and then an up-and-coming speaker contacts me for coaching and then, when his session begins, he does all of the talking. Somewhere I heard that learning is done with the mouth closed. Eventually I began to understand that these particular students do not want education, instead they want to validate that everything they are already doing is right. They come into coaching with their cups full with no room for additional information. That is the wrong reason to seek coaching. As a result, the first thing I ask each of my new students is, "Do you want education or validation?" Although it is not easy to face the reality of your current condition, it is absolutely necessary if you want to get to another place. Your coach will help you do that.

A legendary comedy writer once told me that he had an up-and-coming comedy writer call him and beg him to be his coach. Over time the legendary writer gave in and decided to coach the student. In their very first session, after the legend gave some advice, the student said, "You don't know what's funny. That will never work. That's not good advice for me." Needless to say that was their first and last coaching session together. Don't get me wrong, you do not need to take everything a coach says and use it, but you do need to enter the sessions with an open mind looking through the lens of education not validation.

Hire the Right Coach

Before hiring my coach, I researched to find the person that would benefit me the most. How? I asked my friends in the speaking industry to provide names of the top coaches. I then purchased materials from several of them to get an understanding of what each one brings to the table. Then and only then did I call my prospective coach.

There are many views on this topic but I suggest finding a coach who is strong where you are weak. Some people believe in finding a coach that reflects their style, but I firmly believe in finding a coach whose style is different. If you get a mirror image of yourself, you will not learn much. Since my storytelling was strong, I did not seek a coach who only dealt with storytelling. However, since I needed work with my structure, I sought out a coach who was strong in that area and she has since given me a very strong structural foundation.

I suggest that you videotape your presentations, ask others for ways you can improve, and review your speeches objectively so that you can figure out where you may need a stronger foundation whether it is structure, content, delivery, etc. Next identify a pool of potential coaches and purchase some of their materials for review purposes. Finally, decide which one can most likely help you fill your needs. One last thought… it helps to hire a coach who has been where you are hoping to go.

Capture their Genius (and Yours)!

There is absolutely no way you will remember all of the valuable information you receive when being coached unless you record your sessions. If you find a coach that will not let you record your sessions, find another coach. It is that critical. After my two days with my coach, I had over 12 hours of audio. In fact, I still have it today. I even kept my mini-disc recorder turned on when we went to lunch and to dinner, because valuable information comes in all settings. The only time I turned it off was when we went to the Rich Little show because those were the rules and I did not want to get arrested. You want to squeeze every bit of value from your sessions. From these recordings I was able to return to my office and translate the most important points into 37 pages of notes that I carry around like a living breathing textbook.

In your sessions, your coach will have brilliant ideas and strategies for you, but guess what? So will you! Your inner genius will speak louder and louder as your session goes on and you need to capture it. Capture it now and replay it later. Soon, after consistent review of your audio recordings and your written notes, you will start incorporating these new ideas because they will become a part of you. Failure to record it is like purchasing a huge house and living in only one room. You will not get your value's worth.

Go Back for Seconds

The same way a good meal inspires you to go back for seconds, so does a good training session. I was so impressed with my speech coach, I ended up going back across country one month later to do a group training session with her and about 50 people. When I entered the room I was not surprised to see some of the most accomplished speakers in our industry sitting in the chairs as students taking notes expectantly and feverishly. That's what champions do. They get coached constantly and get swept away in an upward spiral of success and improvement. Any one who wants to propel his or her performance in any area needs a coach.

Sometimes when you go for seconds it will be with another coach. No problem. That is a great idea. You can get structure from one coach and then go to another for storytelling. You may seek advice on delivery from another, but it is critical to continue your education through coaching. It is simply the best form of tailored feedback you will ever receive. A good coach will bring out the best in you.

What is The Most Important Ingredient for Coaching?

Courage. Let’s face it, nobody loves to be slapped on the hand or told that the way they do things does not make sense. This fear, not the financial piece, is the number one reason many individuals do not get coached. It takes great courage.

I can remember my good friend and the 2001 Toastmasters International World Champion of Public Speaking Darren LaCroix telling me about a marketing boot camp he attended. Many of the attendees were reluctant to share their current marketing materials because of the feedback they might receive. On the other hand, Darren said, "Hurt me. That's why I'm here." As a result, he has made great strides in his business using his very effective marketing tools. It is no surprise he is a champion. That's what champions do.

You may be wondering, "So Craig, how has being coached paid off for you?" More than the increased business and the drastically enhanced impact I am having on my audiences, I am filled with the excitement of knowing that I am squeezing every ounce of ability out of my potential. Why? That's what champions do. Champions get coached. Are you a champion?

About the Author
Craig Valentine is a professional speaker who provides organizations with the proven processes for peak performance in the areas of change, customer satisfaction, communications, and leadership. He is the author of the book The Nuts and Bolts of Public Speaking and he coaches executives on enhancing their presentation skills. He is the 1999 World Champion of Public Speaking for Toastmasters International.

Thursday, June 01, 2006

8 Speaking "Secrets" Revealed: Part 8

HAVE LOTS OF FUN!

Have you ever consider public speaking to be fun? An activity to indulge in for destressing purposes? Something that you can play around with and reap boundless of joy and happiness?

For most people... hardly! If you recall, public speaking has been ranked as the number one fear, surpassing the fear of death! Who would even associate public speaking with fun??!! However for those who do, they cannot help but be a master at their craft, all thanks to their "play" attitude.

Think about it. If you like a particular activity so much, doing it excessively will not be considered hard work at all right? In fact, you will find every single opportunity to get back to the activity; without any coercion, persuasion or effort! You will be so involved in what you are doing that nothing else around you matters at all. It is as if time went on a standstill...

Unless you enjoy what you are doing, you will never be able to fully maximize your potential. At best, you will just be a good speaker because of all the hard work that you have put in. Imagine if you add the element of fun in it, there is no limit to how good you can be!

So what has fun got to do with being successful in public speaking (or in anything for that matter)?

1. Fun is the best cure against your arch nemesis: Fear

It is like a shiny armour that deflects any worries, doubts and apprehension that you may have. It blesses you with courage to step out of your comfort zone and try new things. It grants you freedom to be creative. It bestows you with immunity against failure. It gives you permission to laugh at yourself. When fun is in the picture, nothing will be too daunting for you.

2. Fun sustains you

When you are having fun, you have essentially open up boundless of pure energy that pushes you towards success. There is no work involved when it comes to honing your public speaking skills. It is part of the fun! Any challenges you faced become part of the game. Instead of mulling over how tough it is, you find yourself inventing new ways to defeat these challenges. In fact the harder the better. Some people call that optimism. To you, it is all part of the game!

3. Fun brings out the best in you

Having fun also allows you to walk the path of least resistance. As such your energies are spent exploring new ground and discovering new things about yourself. You do not care if you succeed or fail. It releases you from the pressure of having to win. What you are more concerned about is that you are enjoying every part of it. As long as you are moving forward with each step that you take, nothing else matters.

Ironically, such attitude creates the most results. Take a look at Dr Richard Feynman. He won a nobel prize out of calculating the relationship between the wobble and the rotation of the plate for fun. His "play" attitude led him to stumble onto quantum electrodynamics! And then there was Einstein, Newton and all other famous scientists.

The same happens when you are on stage too! When you are having fun on stage, it creates instant connection with your audience. Fun is infectious and your audience cannot help but have fun too.

Here's one way you can start having fun with public speaking - Treat it like a game!

Here's what I want you to do for your next speech. Set up some winning criteria i.e. what do you need to do to "win the game". It could come in the form of "My audience will give me a smiley face sticker at the end of my speech" or "I will try something new each time I speak". Pull in a few friends to play the game with you. They could either compete with you or even play judges. And what's a game without rewards? Make sure you plan some enticing rewards for yourself. Invite your friends to pool in some of the prizes too! Increase the stake. And then focus on winning the game! What's there to lose?

Notice the adrenalin rush?
Notice the excitment building up?
Notice that you aren't even concerned about youe fears?

That's what I am talking about. Treat public speaking as a game. Be spontaneous. Be adventurous. Most importantly, have fun with it!

I would recommend that you read Scott's entry on The Secret to Productivity where he shares with you even more practical tips to have fun with what you do!

So the next time you have to give a speech, let your hair out and have fun! Be wild and experiment new things. Even if it flops, you had fun trying it! I shall go against the usual advices that you hear from speech experts. Do NOT take your speech (or yourself) too seriously. Treat it as a game and play your heart out!

"Man is most nearly himself when he achieves the seriousness of a child at play."
Heraclitus, Greek Philosopher (535 - 475 BCE)

Related Posts
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8 Speaking "Secrets" Revealed: Inside-Out
8 Speaking "Secrets" Revealed: Lots and Lots of Stage Time
8 Speaking "Secrets" Revealed: Speak from the Heart
8 Speaking "Secrets" Revealed: Be Coachable
8 Speaking "Secrets" Revealed: Attract Mentors to Assist You
8 Speaking "Secrets" Revealed: Evaluate All Speakers, Simon Cowell's style!