Public speaking has been ranked the number one fear, ahead of death. And since death is the inevitable, it makes sense to conquer your fear of public speaking and even become a successful public speaker! This public speaking blog aims to give you insightful and easy-to-apply tips on various aspects of public speaking that includes overcoming your fear of public speaking, writing speeches, delivering speeches, excelling in presentations, adding humor and much more!

Wednesday, May 24, 2006

8 Speaking "Secrets" Revealed: Part 3

BE COACHABLE

To start off, I will like to quote 1999 World Champion Speaker, Craig Valentine:

"Many people are looking for validation, not education."

How true isn't it? There was once this guy came up to me to ask for comments on his speech. In response, I complimented him and also pointed out a part of his speech that he could improve on. And boy was I in for a shock. All of a sudden, he became defensive and started justifying his actions for the next 15 mins. Apparently I heard him wrong. He wanted me to compliment him and tell him what he wants to hear. He doesn't want any tips on how he can improve. If I would have realized it, I could have avoid the embarassment.

So how open are you to other people's comments and advice? How coachable are you?

You may get the best mentor in the world who has the most incisive insights but if you are not willing to listen and try it for size, there is no way you will ever improve. The most dangerous thing that can happen to a speaker is when he or she becomes complacent. You will find them sitting on their laurels, building false sense of security from their past successes. They stop asking for help. They stop trying new things. They stop becoming hungry and thirsty for new opportunities to grow. And soon, they stop becoming as good as they used to be... and they wonder why...

When you are not coachable, you essentially shortchanged yourself. You shut doors of opportunities to become a phenomenal speaker. And worse, you run the risk of becoming a mediocre speaker. Is that what you want?

Instead, I encourage everyone of you to be a SPONGE! Soak up everything that you can from everyone around you. Remember the first speaking secret I shared with you? Start evaluating any speaker that come your way. See how you can incorporate the good stuff into your speech and avoid all the bad stuff.

Be willing to question the old way of doing things. Each time someone comes up to you to offer their suggestions, listen really hard. Because they have just given you a golden opportunity to be better at your craft. If you find yourself resisting, drop it and listen. Take notes if you want. And spend time thinking through their suggestions. See how you can apply them. If it works, keep it. If it doesn't, chuck it aside. And no matter what you do, keep moving forward!

The next time you think you have hit your peak, stretch yourself and you will find yourself reaching out for a higher peak!

8 Speaking "Secrets" Revealed: Attract Mentors to Assist You.
8 Speaking "Secrets" Revealed: Evaluate All Speakers, Simon Cowell's style!

2 Comments:

Anonymous Scott Young said...

I know exactly what you are talking about. Asking for feedback is often a veiled way for a person to ask you to reassure and support them. Never ask for feedback if you only want to hear the positive, and if you did ask for feedback, embrace any of the negatives you get!

7:46 AM  
Blogger Tripp said...

Right on Scott! :)

10:38 AM  

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